Persephone's Birth Story

My labor started at 9 in the morning, October 20th. It felt like light period cramps. I was really excited for it to start but afraid that it would stop, so I ran around the house getting things cleaned up and ready for the big event. I called my husband Garrett. He was really calm and suggested that I time them and call Beth. I called Beth after timing a few to about 5 min apart. She made me promise to call that evening no matter what so she would know how I was doing. I also called some close friends to let them know that labor may be starting. I managed to have lunch with some friends, get all the baby clothes ready, make the beds, and tie up some loose ends.

By mid-afternoon my husband came home and we went for an walk around the neighborhood. The crampiness never stopped and I was starting to feel a little trippy. I remember he wanted to walk out into a field across the fallen leaves but I couldn't handle it, I needed to stay on the road. We made our way home and it felt good to be inside the sanctuary of our house. We ate dinner and tried to watch a movie but we kept turning the volume down until it was almost totally silent. I felt the most comfortable sitting on the big birth ball and bouncing. Eventually we decided to try to get some rest. Garrett fell asleep but I couldn't. The cramps were just strong enough to keep me awake, but still they felt like my period at it's strongest. I tossed and turned, maybe dozed off a little here and there. Eventually I decided to seek relief in the shower. Then I took a bath. My back was pretty sore. I felt the most comfortable standing up so I got out and paced around in my bathrobe in the dark. Soon, I wanted encouragement and Garrett sat with me in the bathroom on the big birth ball. He called Beth around 5 am. I started to be vocal during the cramps, humming and breathing. I was definitely in labor land at this point, total time distortion. I was keeping my eyes closed and rolling my head between rushes to stay relaxed. Soon the rushes become more intense and my humming became a lot louder and turned into a loud "haaaa". Right at that point Kim arrived. She listed with the doppler in between rushes. Soon Joanne and Margo were there too. I was surrounded by these wonderful people in my bathroom and I just kept working through the sensations, getting louder and louder. Now I really focused on being as relaxed as possible and let everyone take care of me. They gave me sips of juice and water, suggested pee breaks, and suggested different positions. I tried the birth stool and a smaller ball. All the while small amounts of liquid were leaking out onto soaker pads. I thought this was amniotic fluid, maybe I had a pin hole in the sac. Occasionaly Kim or Beth would listen to the baby's heartbeat with the doppler. Everything sounded good.

At somepoint Garrett and I moved to our bed to try to get some rest. Very soon after that a rush came really strong and I could feel my muscles in my abdomen contract and squeeze, like a push. I made a very loud noise, just as involuntarily as the push, and I yelled "That one felt like pushing." Beth checked my cervix and she said all she could feel was baby, no cervix so I could push when I was ready. That was my first internal exam and I was so glad to know I was fully dialated. I had had this fear that I wouldn't dialate or that it would take a really long time. I cried with relief and laughed too, because I felt this wave of excitement that I would be able to push now and that I would meet my baby soon. I tried hand and knees on the bed, it wasn't working so I moved to the birthstool on the floor at the foot of the bed. Now the rushes came a little more spaced out but they were really intense. I continued to make these amazingluy loud noises. I was really screaming. It came from deep inside. I had no idea I could even make noises so loud. Garrett suggested that we stand up and so we paced around the room a bit. When a rush came I hung my arms around his neck and kind of squatted. I was yelling right in his face and pulling down on his neck as hard as I could. Suddenly my water broke. It exploded! Since I thought it had already been leaking out it startled me. I asked "what was that?" With a chuckle someone told me it was my water breaking. Beth said that I would probably feel a bit less pressure now and that I could feel her head if I wanted to. That was such an amazing thing. She was right there!

I moved back to the birth stool and got down to business. The pushing was really intense. I got tense and tried to lift up and away from the sensation. Beth reminded me to work with it, and focus my energy down. I vocalized "open" along with my pushes. This was it. I had to go with it and through it. Mentally I shifted into the mindset of actually pushing a baby out, not just being in labor. Eventually Garrett could see her head. He said he could see "this muc" and held his fingers not very far apart. I said "that's it?!" because it really felt like a whole lot more. I tried to stay relaxed in between pushes, at one point I dozed off and almost fell off the stool. I also had some frustrated moments. I remember asking "why is it taking so long?" I could feel a lot of rectal pressure. Soon she was really crowning. I could feel her moving her head in an up and down "yes" direction. She was working her way out! Suddenly her head was out and she was really wiggling, facing my left thigh. A lot of blood was streaming down her face. I didn't know what it was but I could hear in Beth's voice that she was concerned. After a brief break I pushed again and her whole body rushed out so fast, slippery and long and bumpy with arms and legs and all. What a feeling! I kind of shreiked from the suprise of it. Garrett caught her and handed her to me. We were covered in blood. He had to remind me to see that we had a little girl. Beth palpated my stomach and felt for the placenta to figure out what was going on. There still seemed to be a lot of blood. Now Beth was more concerned and she kept asking me how I felt. Beth gave me a pitocin shot and some homeopathic blood clotting remedy. A little while later I pushed the placenta out. Beth told me that earlier the placenta had partially detached, that was the source of the blood. Persephone still got all the oxygen she needed since part of the placenta was getting blood, but the other part was letting a lot of blood out. I started to feel dizzy and they laid me down immediately. Now I had to stay concious. Beth told me that if I passed out we would have to go to the hospital no matter what. That gave me the motivation I needed. I really fought, blinking my eyes and talking. My doula, Joanne, rubbed my arm to keep me stimulated. Margo fed me honey to bring my bloodsugar up. Once I felt a bit better I was able to breastfeed. Persephone latched on right away and we lay together for a long time. No tears or skidmarks, no interventions, no hospital; just a wonderful, natural birth at my own pace in my home surrounded by my husband and some very loving, wise, and nurturing midwives.